I am currently obsessed with plus size blogs. The fashion on there is just to die for. I thank the WIFI gods that I found this article called “What Being a Fat Woman Is Really Like” that was talking about the complexities of being a fat woman. I do not even feel comfortable using the word complexities as though being fat is a disease. This article gave me a chance to say a lot of things that I was dying to say but just didn’t know how.
Below are my answers to the same questions as the original article. I took out a lot of the questions because some of them were just annoying and retarded,
How do you feel when other women around you complain about feeling/being fat?
When women complain about feeling or being fat, especially the really skinny ones, so help me God, I just want to cut them. Yes, I am violent like that. They should just take a seat or read a damn book. Women like that are just fishing for compliments, attention or reassurance. I ignore them. They eventually take a seat or go on back to their little corner or find someone who can pretend to give a shit.
But there is this other type of woman, who is not fat but has had it drummed into her head that she is fat and that being fat, is ugly and it is the worst thing that could happen to you. I just want to hug them and tell them that they are beaurifurr no matterrrrr what other people say. And yes sometimes I pull out my imaginary mic and break into the Christina Aguilera jam.
How has your body image changed since high school or College?
The most insecure I have ever been was before I turned 13. I look at pictures from way back then and swear to God, I don’t remember being that pretty or skinny (I was so damn skinny). I just remember waking up, feeling so fat and not wanting to go to school. I was so stuck feeling fat i never stopped to breathe. Before I turned 13, I felt too dark, too fat and too ugly. It probably sounds like I am throwing myself a pity party right now but who doesn’t love a great pity party.
So how has my body image changed since I was 13? It has changed by leaps and bounds. I have grown so much since then, spiritually, emotionally, mentally and physically especially physically. I have grown a whole lot physically. Hehe, I am not telling you how much I weigh, I could tell you my age though but never how much I weigh.
Have you tried dieting? What happened?
I have not seriously tried to diet. I have chosen to eat better, sometimes.
Do you think in your case your weight is partly or entirely genetic?
I stunk at biology so I just cannot give an informed response. My grandmother is a lot on the plus side; I have first cousins who are very much on the plus side. One of them turned 18 recently and she was telling me how she really wanted to lose the weight. Good for her I guess. What tugged at my heart strings was the way she talked about herself being fat and unacceptable. My heart broke for her. I gave her a pep talk for a couple of hours she did not seem convinced so I will pray for her. (I am spiritual like that as well). However, I have very skinny siblings. That is just a story for another day.
Do you consider yourself healthy? Have there been instances where people assumed you were unhealthy?
I will not even bother telling a lie. It is too damn exhausting. I do not consider myself healthy. I pant after a walk up a flight of stairs. However, my heart is doing just fine, so is my blood pressure. I woke up this morning, I am alive that is what should matter.
Are your parents both supportive of you at the weight you’re at? Have they always been?
My parents worry that I will drop dead one day because of the weight I am at. They are just constantly getting me to take walks, go fetch things and tricking me to exercise. My Dad is always giving me pointers on how to stretch before and after I exercise. He asks me to order the healthiest things on the menu when we go out. My mother on the same hand cringes when I wear anything that shows off my tummy rolls. But doesn’t every parent treat their children like that? Have my parents ever made me feel less because of my weight? Never ever. One day I will start to take them seriously and actually exercise and eat right. Any day now actually.
How do you think retailers can improve clothes for plus-size people?
The hardest thing for me used to be finding clothes that fit. I remember being 12 and going shopping with my mother. I hated it so much. We would go store to store, all day long, looking for clothes and I would get so frustrated and start to sob. The clothes would cost a chubby arm and a leg. It was crazy as though they were charging for the extra material used. However, today I can find clothes anywhere. I always pull my mother’s leg and tell her that the day they stop making clothes in my size will be the day I get me some gym membership. Yes, I think I am funny.
Do you think plus-size women are judged differently than plus-sized men are? How?
My boy friend is on the plus side, his life seems dandy. He is not worried about his lack of abs or his one pack. In my opinion, men on the plus side do get it easy. Plus size women on the other hand are ridiculed for every pound they put on.
Do you think there’s an assumption made/stereotype that exists about plus-size people? How would you respond to it?
There are several stereotypes that just make me so mad. The first one being that people look at someone on the plus side and they will immediately assume that the person is lazy. Fine I am kind of lazy, I would rather lounge than sweat but come on give me a chance. Do not write me off as lazy but also if you decide to write me then that is your loss. Do have a good life.
The second stereotype is that most men believe that women on the plus side are easy, desperate for some love and attention. Guys come up to me all the time (blowing own trumpet), a lot of these guys feel like they are doing me a favor for which I should be awfully grateful and show some appreciation. How do I respond to this stereotype? I do absolutely nothing. The idiota eventually realizes that they are backing up the wrong tree.
Do you think there’s ever a right way or time to express concern about someone’s weight?
I will not mince words on this one. There is no right way to express concern about someone’s weight. It is none of your damn business that I look like a house. I may be fat but that has not affected my sight in any way, Thank you very much. I am not blind. I can see that I have put on weight in all the wrong places but your concern is not appreciated. It is just not necessary. It is rude and grown people should know better. This tough love and intervention nonsense that people live for is just mavi ya kuku (read chicken shit). People just need to get a life, pick your nose and watch some porn. It is just not your place to be concerned about my weight.
What are the worst things people have said to you about your body?
A lot of things have been said about my weight. A lot of these things are crazy funny. Like pee in your pants and laugh for days kind of funny. The one thing that I will never forget though, someone said to me that no man would ever love me and the only reason why a man would ever sleep with me is so that he can be able to check sleeping with a fatty off his bucket list.
How did you respond?
I suck at great come backs. I really do, I have lost so many fights because of that. I did not respond. Several years later I still don’t have a response.
Do you find yourself hanging out with women who are closer to your size?
I constantly tell my friends that I hate pretty people, so if you are my friend then clearly you are not pretty. It sounds so much funnier when I say it in my head. I have friends in every shape, size and colour. Life is too short to hang with only fatties. However, I am that girl who will root for the plus size politician, model, blogger, dancer, singer and reality TV star. We fatties need to stick together.
How has your weight affected your sex life, if at all?
People “Nsese Nyo Nengwa Eli.” I am such a prude, so I will not be talking about my sex life.
When you’ve been single, has your weight affected your dating life?
I have not been single in a very very very long time so I do not know the answer to this one. However, I acknowledge that people are shallow and I do not fit in the bracket of what is socially accepted as beautiful or sexy but do I care or have I ever cared? Nope. Will I be having sleepless nights over that fact? Nope, I will be sleeping like a baby. eff society's beauty standards i refuse to conform.
I feel the need to disclaimer this post.
No one was harmed during the writing of this post.
